some things are like a dream-

you wake up and only bits and pieces you remember,

only like the odds and evens they remain,

and then you wonder, if they even really happened at all?

though it is usually with a sigh

(because dreams are sometimes the only place where i allow myself to indulge in whatever illogical, unreasonable, mindless thoughts i want)

i resign to waking up,

and feel thankful to be rational again.

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waking up to an argument is not the best of way to kick-start a Sunday morning.

but, not like i have a choice i guess?

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an argument (in my humble opinion) is mostly started with the intent to make a point or achieve an objective (people who start arguments for illogical reasons or just to vent or to annoy/anger other people i cannot relate to), for example, if i argue with someone it would be highly likely because i believe the person is being unreasonable, or has acted in a unjust manner, and if i would need to argue to death i would do it because i hold my viewpoint strong and clear in both my heart and my mind.

the thing i hate the most is when people argue and lose control-

they lose sense of the reason/original objective of the argument and start talking gibberish and bringing in all kinds of 'supporting statements' that are illogical or worse still, highly irrelevant to the topic; statements that are personal attacks, highly emotional charged criticisms that are just hurtful and totally uncalled for.

that is when people lose themselves

(quite literally)

and it can be quite ugly and disgusting to watch.

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in my universe, the way i imagine(d) it/things,

we are all lost souls driftingly aimlessly.

we meet another soul and perhaps if we are lucky,

we can give each other temporary comfort.

there is nothing good or bad,

nothing right or wrong,

there is nothing incomplete or complete.

Who can satisfy you, really?

nobody but yourself, i suppose.

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sometimes ideals are one thing-

to learn to dissociate ideals from reality is an ability that is a strength, in my opinion,

because ideals can be so disparate from reality, that if you try to impose your ideals such that your reality has to be exactly the same, all it would do is just make you suffer.

Perhaps to achieve some things for example, get married, have children, etc are what i could consider to be ideals that make life complete-

however, in reality i am keenly aware that these ideals may not occur and i am perfectly at terms with that.

J said that some people actively seek out these ideals,

and that i am passive, in this way.

but it's just that i believe some things cannot be forced?

Certainly opportunities can be sought out, but whether things turn out smoothly;

usually there is a multitude of factors both extrinsic and intrinsic, some of which clearly within your knowledge are beyond your control.

this is neither blaming/grumbling nor giving in/admitting to fate;

it is quite simply accepting things as they come, when they come.

embrace the random!

passive as this may be.