Is it true,

I often wonder,

that in life, in general, some things are good,

only because (there are) other things (that) are bad?

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Ideals.

we must have talked about this n times, (where n is a integer ---> infinity), had this conversation repeated so many times over the phone, me slouching on the sofa, her lying on her bed, over different times, different occasions, in the morning (less so since she doesn't get up so early), in the afternoon, at night, but still, this remains fresh in my mind.

Q always liked to talk to me about the future, about my ideals, about her ideals-

the ideal kind of future, the ideal kind of job, the ideal kind of boyfriend, husband, family, children, old age even....

the thing about ideals is that,

while they remain central to you and close to your heart,

sometimes reality shocks/surprises you in ways unimagineable,

like being caught by a sudden tap on the shoulder, or peck on the check.

originally you might have thought you wanted things to be in a certain way;

or hoped that people/things pan out how you anticipated for them to be;

but in reality when real time, real people, real things play out,

you find you are totally off guard and unprepared,

and yet,

somehow strangely

despite how reality strays from your ideals,

you may actually be happy in ways you never imagined you could be.

bizarre, life, this thing.

sigh.

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'tan, can't imagine you put two person pic as your profile picture, i will never do that'

neither did I, Soohf.

I thought I would/could be cool and aloof forever.

but I guess in life there are so many unexpected things...

ha ha ha.

Sigh.

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I think that if you meet someone who makes you happy,

such that you would like that person, to stay in your life,(hopefully),

for a very, very, very, very, very long time (i don't/won't say forever),

that is quite good enough.

perhaps the feeling is really very unsettling-

things feel just right, and everything feels so adequate, so right,

and you have this nagging voice in your head telling you, 'he's 'the one'

but 'the one' or not 'the one',

that's not important,

because I don't really believe in the concept/idea of 'the one'.

Separation in life is inevitable-

by death or quarrel, or divorce or whatever other means-

'The one'; it's a belief, like religion,

like santa claus, like the tooth fairy, like Jesus,

which in the case of all examples mentioned,

fortunately or unfortunately,

I don't believe.

The only way of knowing if a person is 'the one' or not the one,

is to actually live your life with that person, isn't it?

Perhaps at 80, at your deathbed, when the last bit of life is about to slowly leave you,

after you've lived and toiled through every thing together, grumbled and mumbled and shouted and cried and hugged and loved every single cell on each other's body, then perhaps you would then be bestowed with the good knowledge that indeed,

that person,

is 'the one'.

Still, IMO, there is no way of knowing for sure.

but a gut feeling is good enough, I think.

and to revisit my initial and persisting thought,

If you meet someone who makes you happy, such that you would like that person, to stay in your life, (hopefully), for a very, very, very, very, very long time (I don't/won't say forever)

that is certainly good enough.