i recently re-caught on the korean drama fever and i'm really kind of liking it. it started with reading the episode recaps on javabeans, which is really super fantastic with photos and like full recaps and even character/plot analyses and stuff, then i got really into the drama so now i'm watching it; the drama 'pasta'. it's about this novice pasta chef, who likes her head chef who is charming but somewhat bastardly. and of course there are other elements in the plot i should be talking about really but i don't know why i feel so conflicted/into the dynamics between her and him to the point of not really caring about everything else.

every episode i watch and i look at the two of them and think 'how cute they look together' and i feel like banging the table and my guts get knotted up because of the way he treats her because she likes him so much and he knows it but he takes it ohso for granted.

the truth is probably/possibly i am really impressed/envious that she is able to like someone so wholeheartedly and be committed to it and not be a single bit abashed/embarrassed about this affection. there are probably tinges of pride here and there but it never ever seems to get in the way of them because she just likes him so much it's not possible ever.

like sometimes in my head im just thinking

'what is the problem with this girl man?'

cause the guy is just so fucking bad to her :(

but she just loves him, like.....

how can you do that?

maybe one day i'd eat up my pride whole and love somebody so much i'd look like an idiot just like her