some senseless [and probably thoughtless and careless, harmless] off-handed comment
i will take a holiday,
it still makes me sad that i'm so unsure when it comes to my body-image.
how i can feel a small stab of insecurity/panic literally when it happens;
why? but why.....
why am i so insecure?
not good enough to do this,
not good enough to be that,
not good enough for someone;
not good enough, not smart enough, not slim enough, not pretty enough
there are a dozen things; but only one thing remains/lingers at the back of my mind-
nothing has worked, nothing done, no where gone, no one become-
in the end i realise
it's/i'm still at where it/i was.
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the truth is,
i still miss-
.....
i will take a holiday,
and when i come back
i will throw away these senseless feelings,
unrequited things, and this uncompleted sentence.
for good.
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i open my wardrobe and it's bursting with beautiful clothes but i still can't lie to myself about how i ugly i feel inside
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sometimes when you've just started to gather enough courage to set your mind to do something that's painful somebody whispers something in your ear and panic sets in and once panic sets in
you go back to doing things the way they were like how you were all screwed up and wrong and
all is lost
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everything was fine and the weather was good but
[i was] not strong enough today
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