there was nothing said but i saw betrayal in his eyes.
you know it's not the same when people never ever look you in the eye again, talk to you like last time, laugh with you like last time.

sometimes it almost feels like you're strangers.

i guess all i could feel was sadness and guilt that i could not stick it through the silent promise i made to him since the first time we did something together in hall.
only pity,

but no regret.

alas, things will never be the same again.
---------------------------------------------------------

something i've always wanted to do.

it was romantic, quiet, solitary.
with the exception of darell sitting opposite me, humming the tune of some chinese pop song, or occasionally letting out a giggle while her eyes were fixated at the laptop sitting in front of her.

maybe i'd have liked it better if i did it alone, but i was kind of glad she was with me.
it was quiet, and kind of nice.
we found a nice place, with power plugs, but i didnt bring my charger, forgetful and disorganized me, and thus had to ration my laptop battery, which turned out to be a good thing cause i actually did some work as a result.

and it was actually like how i imagined, with confused tourists sitting around, some busy-looking students focused on their words, random stranglers here and there, and the staff walking around doing random things, and the occasional pilot/stewardess or two, walking briskly, chatting with their companions if any, their hands tugging as their trolley luggage.

there is something nice about the place, the feeling of cleaness and freshness, and the feeling of being at a place where you're bidding people farewell, or welcoming new people or old people back... being at a place of loss, gain, acceptance, a place of transit, a place of wait...
a place nowhere in between.
and i like it.

it was a pity we couldnt really get into the area beyond the check-in, and darell was whining the whole time cause there was delifrance, ya kun, and all sorts of random things inside there to do and it was open 24/7 and the floor was nice and carpeted not like the outside.
but i guess it was nice.

i think i'll do it another time, maybe.
when i'm feeling emo.
take the last train there and camp the night till the break of dawn.
buy a cup of latte,
plug in my laptop,
have a good read or two,
chat with random people on msn,
surf meaningless websites,
or do simply nothing at all.

don't ask why i like it,

i just think it's romantic.