i dont really like the people at the hospital. i mean, they ARE nice people [now i sound like im contradicting myself] but put in the hospital context, im not so sure.
they seem like bloody hypocrites who all really love to spend and earn money =(

which is bloody sad, because...
i know this sounds 101% naive, but
i always believed the purpose of setting up a hospital or providing medical care of any sort should be to benefit the public.
i am SO fit to serve the government. haha, for the benefit for the greater masses.
but no, seriously, im not kidding.

i look at the way they waste money [they have a really good staff buffet breakfast every wednesday, they claim taxi fares for the most ridiculous things like going to beach road to buy smiley stickers] and i feel really sad. both for singapore's poor people and for the singapore mint.

the other day the ladies were discussing about prada, lv, and channel etc, in the staff room.
i felt really sick. =( i honestly dont want to become one of them in future.
i keep forgetting that i work in a private hospital.
its almost built like a hotel [yes, im not exaggerating at all].
staying there accumulates costs that summount to staying in a hotel, anyway.

theres a concierge. enough said.

you know what, the head of department [mental ward] is not a psychologist. she is an experienced business manager/marketer. she talks about revenue, profits, losses. at that point of time, i got extremely depressed.
i always thought that the head of department should be an experienced and well-trained clinical psychologist with a counselling background as well. or something like that. cream of the crop.
remind me, because i forget that a person like that probably wouldnt know how to make profits for the hospital


for a normal, neither rich nor poor singaporean like me, this has been an eye opener.
theres a royal suite with gold-weaved carpets. the cost of staying there is the equivalence of staying in raffles hotel.
for us, [ward 14] theres this 5 day package i think. costs 1500. or was it 3 days?... i cant rmbr.

i understand why people dont go to imh, unless they really cant afford the fees.
theres the stigma of being labelled 'crazy'.... the fear of being laughed at or looked at in a different kind of way...
if you go to a private hospital, at most you just tell people you were ill. people usually dont ask more..
but once you say imh, you can see it in their eyes.

near the end of this year, they re holding a seminar on counselling.
they re calculating how to maximise profits and reduce the costs. they re inviting a bunch of really expensive old geezers to give talks [ok, maybe not old. just complacent. and they charge per day. by the thousands or more] to 'educate the public on counselling strategies to help cope with the new problems surfacing in our lives'.
im supposed to be at the hospital to help with the admin side of this. i get a clinical attachment too, but this is a side thing.

i feel sick.
i decided im not suited for working in the private sector.
maybe when im older and need pension or need money for a vacation.
till then, if money still doesnt mean that much to me.

i prefer helping people.
sigh.