existence.


thinking of typing a thoughtful power because i feel empowered today. i shall not go on msn later after i reach home. anyway thats not important, im digressing again


the problem with existence. i was discussing things with bingxi, aka THE BRILLIANT ONE, about life and being content and money and its banes and stuff. and he told me he did not comprehend how one could be content with just staying at one phase in life and not try to achieve more of the following


MONEY
POWER
INFLUENCE
got more, but i cant remember what THE BRILLIANT ONE said. anyway its true and undeniable that these 3 VERY IMPORTANT things are so called interdependent and can be related to one another. i.e you got one, you ll get a little of the other indirectly.
and he was saying that he wanted a lot of these


funny. ben said almost the same thing. he is THE ENIGMATIC ONE. i just cant read him sometimes, its so hard. and THE ENIGMATIC ONE kept stressing the correlation between himself and THE BRILLIANT ONE. i guess they re similar in one way or many others


out of point. anyway, how can you want the whole world?
actually even if you gave it to me, i wouldnt want it.


now what has all this got to do with THE PROBLEM OF EXISTENCE?
simply because one of my defending arguments was the PRESENT OF EXISTENCE. dont you think we were born into this world as a blessing to others and both ourselves? i know someone who was born into this world to make other people happier. hes THE BLESSED ONE. you know who you are. haha. but anyway, for me, just being able to exist in this world is quite a feat.
and being a human.


you can always argue if i were something else i wouldnt be me, but thats hardly the question to ask since its just an argument and if you re as good as THE BRILLIANT ONE, OR THE ENIGMATIC ONE, i d lose out to you because my aruging skills really pale in comparison


now, about the problem of existence. some people might go on and take it a bit further by adding their religious knowledge and preachings but i have almost none. even if i have, i am not cofident of being 100% correct about it. anyway im agnostic. and thats a choice, not to be scorned at or frowned upon as in american societies. its really nonsense because personally i believe religion is a individual choice. if your family forced you to be christian, but that is not your calling and you are not a fervent believer, what is the point then.


existence. one cannot assume that since we exist, therefore it is a given and thus should be taken for granted, as some believe. again, this is my personal opinion, you may choose to believe, or not.


sometimes life is just about coexisting with other conflicting individuals. the mere existence of myself causes pain, anguish, irritation, sadness, and whatever negative emotions to others around me. its all about tolerating these conflicts and disparities and making compromise


shit i digressed again. i shall change the topic, it is no longer the problem of existence. before i make a real post on that, i think i ll read up more. haha.


for me, existing and being able to love and be loved is, i daresay, the most important thing in the world. money is important, but money is not an equivalent to all these eminent but intangible things. money is cold, but my heart is warm. my hands hold the money i earn from a hard days work, and i use it to exchange for some food so it should keep my stomach full, but my heart receives the warmth from you love and in many ways other parts of me are warmed as well.


i agree. money is damn important. im at this office in paya ubi doing godknowswhat for a mere pay of N dollars an hour where n is a number between 5 and 8. the boss smokes, the job sucks, and then air con is damn freaking cold, but my shi fu is so nice. and boss is so nice as well. the positive externalities outweigh the negative ones by so much more.


i dont think i could ever be someone like who THE BRILLIANT ONE OR THE ENIGMATIC ONE could be. sometimes i feel so small
i envision THE BRILLIANT ONE'S face appearing on forbes international
and
THE ENIGMATIC ONE'S artworks being showcased all over the world and high sought after


but im content. and im actually happy.
and i ve gone off topic again.
maybe if im really bored i ll do a long post again. later.
till then
im freezing cold
my fingers are numb
but i have a warm heart.