i hate asking favours-

it's probably the thing i like to do least in the whole wide world (besides housework, GAH).

i know it's horrible to hope for people to offer help or do nice things spontaneously but it really makes things a whole lot easier- you just have to smile sheepishly and say 'geez, thanks man!' and look really appreciative. better than being on the begging end and have some people give you the pissed-but-obliged-to-help look.

and being majorly sick/injured/in need of helping really sucks. it just sucks, big time.

for the duration of 2hours? or less that i was there i think i must have been asked 7 times? by different people: 'are you here alone?' and then given the sympathetic look before being given help.

it scares me, to be in such a state of physical vulnerability,

(hell worse than any kind of emotional vulnerability- at least that can be concealed!)

and it worries me a little, how much people seem to have this expectant attitude about your family being the kind of social support when you're physically unwell.

(what about the homeless? childless? what happens when they break a leg? fall sick? who wheels them around? helps them buy lunch?)

goodness.

the kind of burden.

(i hope) this will never happen to me again.

cause (not to be a whiner but frankly) my family ain't exactly the spontaneous type.

----------------------------------------

my dad used to always get pissed about how much time and effort i put into my friendships (since he's rather BLAH in that department himself and is a self-proclaimed family man) but really once again, for the nth time already (where n -------------------> infinity) i cannot help but feel thankful and eternally grateful for the help i received from my circle of friends cause they really are the most amazing support group ever-

and for you really,

i am and will be eternally thankful for your existence.

you are the soul mate i always wanted,

the family member i never had,

since the first year of knowing you my gut already told me you were the best thing to happen to me ever- but sometimes i just forgot it and let my emotions and life's frustrations get in the way.

you're just always there for me when i need somebody the most-

without me even needing to request anything-

thanks-

i can never thank you enough.

(who else would accompany me to A&E, and wheel me around on a wheelchair on a weekday afternoon? not even my sister on holiday- she's rather play her online game. =/ sigh. oh well.)