somehow sometime this week,

i found myself feeling a little like a pathetic sad specimen of a sod; with no god to pray to, no buddha's leg to hug last minute, no lover to be consoled by, and no bolster to hug for comfort;

things got to an all-time low, with 2 deadlines worth 40% each, 3 tests, 2 minimal-commitment modules, and 1 really 'statutory' group mate.

and even better!

news of a closed book exam for one of my cores.

[which we had an open book CA for, and were really anticipating/hoping for an open book final]

which is really.... smashing really.

we will all probably be dying together anyway,

but i still felt like commiting suicide.

but now it's friday.

the tests are over [however easy/hard they might have been; however poorly/well i may have scored], the projects have been finished and handed up on time, and

i find,

i am still rather alive.

with no god to pray to,

no lover to be consoled by,

and no bolster to cling on for comfort.

the thing is,

maybe i don't really need these things. at all.

i mean, i still am [trying to] get used to;

[the] somethings in my life [that] i can't control;

but no matter what happens,

i guess you can always depend on yourself.