it's scary how you can make me smile and maybe it might not mean anything at all

it's sad, but i feel happy-silly at the same time.

it's sad, that i feel happy-silly all the same.

so much for determination.

oh, just shoot me already.

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i wanted to go into seclusion/hermit-ation,

sleep by 12am and wake up for breakfast at 7,

camp at the library and read my readings on time,

not be contactable/not check stupid facebook or msn,

not be distracted by other things that shouldnt be a focus,

but still i am that <---------> far from reaching my goal in life

[but i went for class today okay. even though im taking the module alone.

and even though the weather was nice and my blanket was nice and warm.]