you must really help me okay?
like when you see me, like dissuade me or something.
i'm really serious about it this time; 100% resolution man!

new year resolution: 努力向上积极减肥

oh come on,
i didn't like pineapple tarts that much anyway!
and after how nixon explained to me the evils of PTs,
i think i totally lost my appetite.

pros: i'll look nicer, i'll be lighter when bingjie flips me over, and he won't have such a hard time, and i'll feel more confident too! wow.
cons: er, less nice food.

oh well,
give and take.
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today during training it reminded me of the time i had my period and i didn't really realise the impact of it but i went to donate blood at that time and i really felt faint for a while and kind of couldn't walk straight and slightly regretted it afterwards.



but the best part of training came after.
when sensei talked to us seniors individually and corrected us and i think i kind of got it what he's trying to say....

sensei is so kind sometimes when he's talking i feel like im squirming out of pride inside.
i've never thought about it, not ever since i first joined, but i might continue kendo after i graduate. i hope i can come back and contribute, and help the juniors in future, when i become strong. but it's too early to say.... i guess i ll be busy with employment seeking, but....

i'm thinking about it.

it's true,
if we dont make a change and help NUSKC,
who will do it?

we will remain a 2 year dojo forever.

and i guess i'm nobody; i'm not fantastic, im not a strong fighter,
but i guess there IS something i can bring back....
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today during dance mel told me that i have nice eyes, very sincerely.
this is reminiscent of the time a choir junior, who is very VERY VERY pretty, came up to me and told me that, 'you're so pretty, your hair is so nice'


it's like the peacock telling the penguin that it's awesome.
i mean i gues you could say that penguins are awesome too,
but penguins are fat and stocky and dumpy man!
i mean they're kind of cute, [i guess thats the saving grace. im not saying im cute, im just saying i have my saving grace. i can er, be a good friend. and er, i am....
actually....
im good at....
er,
good at...
good at...

something la, something!]

but hello!
but you get my point man? penguins are, er, okay, but peacocks are totally awesome!

i think i could not hide my excitement/squirming inside as i stared into her eyes,
BECAUSE SHE IS SO PRETTY MAN, and HOT PLUS SHE'S HUMBLE.
and she is like how friendly and always try to include me
and help me not feel left out though im close to no one

T__________________T
why do such nice people exist in the world!!!!!!!
it totally explains why she's so well-liked!
oh, let me squirm in gratefulness inside!

i should be glad that girls give me compliments right?
okay i shall be grateful for the rest of the day.
oh,
and like a rice sack, i was flipped over by my already very tired but still very friendly and kind partner bingxie. i think jessica must be less than half of my weight and i dont think guys usually need to lift and flip their girlfriends over like rice sacks usually for no reason during normal circumstances in everydaylife [for some reason i cannot imagine jessica doing that with her nice long legs oh why i wonder is she not dancing they should dance together]
but anyway that's not the point!


thus my new year resolution.

not only will i study hard,
i will train hard,
dance well,
and lose weight.

it will work okay.
sensei said that 8th dans can will themselves to do anything.

i'm nowhere close,
but i'm feeling i can do it already!

new year,
HERE I COME!!!!