Embracing the inner auntie in me


I woke up today with a very serious mission. To disprove the common misconception that an auntie can be cool.
Armed with my borrowed mp3 [my dads], donning my most comfortable and reliable njc aerius purple house tee, complete with unironed grey nj school skirt, and wallet in tow, I stepped out of my house, on a journey of great bargains and deals.


Erm, actually, in plain terms, I woke up groggy, dressed sloppily, and left house to shop at the nearby NTUC. Yep.


However auntie that may sound, I seriously like it. I like shopping there cos their stuff is almost always cheaper than at other places, and plus nowadays they import like good stuff from japan and korea, so I dont have to go to like cold storage or wherever to get these stuff. I remember that once ago, a friend of mine, or used to be, told me that she disliked NTUC and preferred cold storage because NTUC seems low class. ER.
Its no wonder her weekly pocket money is a 3 figure sum that more than 3 times of mine. She probably has a trust fund anyway.
But im pretty happy being a cheapskate auntie.


As I type for this post
I welcome everyone to
Embrace your inner auntie.


In fact, some guys I know are more auntie than me. thats damn freaky since im like super duper auntie already. But, veering off track for a moment, can you Singapore guys be more man? Its like, out of the guys I know, around half are less man than me. okay, maybe im too man for a girl, but you guys seriously dont make the grade. I know that metrosexual guys and SNAGs are all the rage now, but what really appeals to a girl is a guy that is man enough to erm, provide, protect and eerm, produce, as in, reproduce. As we all learn in bio. It’s a biological thing.


Do you order time magazine? The latest issue nearly make me vomit my wonderful chocolate fudge brownie ben and jerrys ice cream all over the newly vacuumed marble floor.
I think androgynous-looking guys are quite brilliant eye candy. I mean those which have high cheek bones and straight, wonderful ang moh like noses. Better if they are tall and slightly muscled and have hair thats slightly long but a bit ruffled and messy.
*[ps. That guy inside the acuvue lenses commercial is so damn good looking T_T yummy yummy]*[on second thought, I know I would never have the luck to find a guy like that to spend the rest of my life with, but just imagine, how wonderful it would be to wake up next to him! T_T]
But I think guys who put mascara are pushing their luck too far. And theres where time magazine should draw the line, unless it wants females like me to puke all over its nicely printed magazine covers. Eek.
=_= sigh. And we talk about equality of the sexes all the time. I think very soon I ll give up and surrender and become a guy so that there ll be a role reversal and my boyfriend can be my girlfriend because most of the guys I know are so niang that the probability of me finding a more masculine than me bf is near zero.
That was a really long sentence.


Going back, embracing your inner auntie. Yes.
How do you know you re becoming one?
When your mom is browsing through sweets at cold storage and contemplating whether to buy wethers original [however-you-spell-it-correct-me-i-spell-badly], you tell her point blank that its around ten cents cheaper at NTUC. And she gives you one of those acknowledging nods as if to say, welcome to the club.


In fact, I frequent NTUC so much my mom gave me her extra link point card already. Or whatever you call it.
But NTUC sells stuff thats cheap and good. Reasonable. Plus since I study and know my facts well, its tripartite with the government and the employers, blah blah, they cant possibly charge impossible prices. Its like the official trade union, what can I say lah.
Fair price~ *music plays*


I like buying ice cream [ben and jerrys! Cost a bomb but tastes like heaven] and tim tam biscuits. Or is it flim flam. Wait, I think flim flam means nonsense. Never mind that.
Getting out of point. I guess the girls nowadays are embarrassed to show their inner auntie. What, it will freak guys out? Maybe. But later in life, you ll regret it when the guy realizes you suck at buying cheap groceries or at doing housework. =shrug=
Its no big deal being your auntie self. :)


I guess im my normal 18 year old self sometimes. I mean, I did spend 21 dollars on that green-neonish-funky-munky-thermoflask-nike-bottle and 60 on that dirty-green-really-cool-and-poser-but-i-dont-look-poser-so-if-i-carry-it-its-ok-billabong-huge-11litre-bag.
Not very auntie like I guess. =shrug= haha.


Soon I envision a proliferation of auntie-gangs in the heartlands of Singapore. But it wont be anytime soon unless I go on and start an auntie revolution. But it’s an open secret and unanimous that aunties hold the greatest power in Singapore. Both in terms of economic influence and erm, in the house. We should do a special coverage on these very important members of the society. They watch our local serials [I seriously doubt I would be able to tolerate that, quite unfortunately] support our local artistes [my to my own chagrin], dive the economy by purchasing goods, ensure goods are kept price competitive by showing their readiness to switch to cheaper substitutes, make sure our kids do well and get 4 A stars for PSLE, and nag at their husbands to give them money for saving [contributing to loanable funds ah, what would our investors and government do without them] and also contribute actively to charitable organizations by dialing 1900 112 6868 or similar donation numbers.


Its no surprise that your mom is an auntie too, right? Aunties are so brilliant.
So go embrace your inner auntie today. :) well done aunties.