would you take the risk if you could already almost predict accurately the outcome? even if you know that things would not last...

sometimes you jump into things knowing that you ll regret it. or maybe so... not that you ll regret jumping into it, but just regretting the outcome... but its not as if you could have done anything to alter the outcome
could you? can you?...

do you believe in fate?...

despite knowing its bad for you. its just like, how ironic. the best tasting things in life as often the most deadliest. chocolate and ice cream can cause obesity. too much seafood and cause high cholesterol and a series of illnesses that are related.. etc etc. what you re often most attracted to is whats usually the most bad bad bad things...

its almost as if... you weighed the pros and cons already and decided your desires or your want for that thing/person/food is strong even for you to neglect the dire consequences.


im listening to david tao's [susan said]. the tune is extremely catchy and great for easy listening. but a second listen/look at the lyrics and i felt this weird tearing feeling inside my heart
susan was strong susan was persistent susan believed that sam would come back for her...

sigh. we all know whats going to happen, dont we?

since she loved and she believed, she decided to take the risk. she left her hometown in tai bei to search for sam in nan jing. alas, she met up with some bandits/robbers/ who wanted to... okay you know what. this is set in old china... so its the rob and rape thing... ca you imagine how scared susan must have been? all alone, just a weak girl without any knowledge of how to protect herself, neither did she have money...

so she said


过往的君子请你听我言 哪一位去我南京转 与我那三郎把信转 就说苏三把命断 来生变一苹狗一苹马 我当报还

:( susan....
im not sure if this thing can appear properly in chinese... if u re interested i can send u the song.. lyrics are at :http://www.lyricool.com/show.jsp?song_id=48811&lan=gb

bu zai hu ai qing li shang tong zai suo nan mian
yi ge ren que yi ge shi jie...



now i know why. because because... :)